Questions
by fiore777
Summary: A silly drabble, various members of the Hunter x Hunter cast are asked the questions: Why did the chicken cross the road? How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? What is love?
1. Why did the chicken cross the road?

_Disclaimer_ - Hunter x Hunter does not belong to me, all characters and such are the marvelous product of Yoshihiro Togashi.

_A Note_ - The mind sure does wander in the hours before sleep, here is a random product of that wandering.

Why did the chicken cross the road?  
(as answered by the cast of Hunter x Hunter because what else do they have to do between seasons?)

Gon: The chicken wanted to meet his father, the greatest rooster of them all.  
_(In the distance a gryphon could be seen flying by with what appeared to be a rooster upon its back.)_

Killua: Because he wanted to, that and he smelled chocolate.

Leorio: There was a hot hen on the other side.  
Killua: Such are such a pervert, old man.  
Leorio: What! I'm not that much older then you.  
_(Note how he did not disagree with being called a pervert.)_

Kurapika: That is where the bastards who killed his clan went.  
_(Everyone else slowly inches away from Kurapika.)_

Hisoka: Someone very strong (and attractive of course!) was beckoning him over.  
_(Hisoka giggles and leers at Gon.)  
(Gon breaks out in a cold sweat.)_

Menchi: Having the chicken exercise prior to being eaten is the proper way to prepare the meat.

Buhara: I'm hungry, did you say there's chicken around here?_  
(He looks around hungrily as the chicken flees in terror.)_

Illumi: That was the last location his brother was sighted at.  
_(Busily attempting to shove Killua into a bag to take back home.)_

Kikyou: Who cares about a chicken? Where's my dear Killua! Mother misses you!  
_(At this point Killua pauses in his struggle against his elder brother and glares at his mother.)  
(Killua's mother shivers in delight.)_

Machi: To get away from a certain demented magician.  
Hisoka: Your words wound me!  
Machi: Good.

Kuroro Lucifer: He saw a lovely fur-lined trench coat on the other side.

Biscuit: Some gorgeous unpolished gems were just waiting for her on the other side.  
_(Eyes shining, she looks at the array of bishounen before her.)_

Ubougin: It was the strongest chicken and no one could stop it! Can I fight it?

Shalnark: Because I controlled it to do so, though I don't think it particularly wanted to do so.

Shizuku: Hm? What chicken…I don't remember any chicken…


	2. How many licks does it take?

Disclaimer - Hunter x Hunter does not belong to me, all characters and such are the marvelous product of Yoshihiro Togashi.

A Note – As sailor aidos suggested, I am adding another random question to this drabble :P

How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop?  
(as answered by the cast of Hunter x Hunter because what else do they have to do between seasons?)

**Gon**: 1, 2, 3, 4….what number comes next?  
**Killua**: I forgot to count the first time, give me another one!  
_(Killua wrestles the bag from the interviewer and attempts to run away with it.)_

**Kurapica**: (_Eyes interviewer suspiciously._)…Who are you?  
_(He looks over at Gone and Killua.)_  
**Kurapica**: Did you two ever learn to not accept candy from strangers?  
_(Killua reaches over and takes the lollipop from Kurapica's hand and pops it into his own mouth.)_  
**Killua**: Loosen up, Gon knows when something's bad for him and I can take any poison with no ill effects.

**Leorio**: Don't be mean to the interviewer lady, she looks like a nice gal.  
_(He pauses to wink at the interviewer.)_  
**Leorio**: Anyway, I never tried licking one before, I always just bite them the moment I unwrap them.

**Hisoka**: Only one if you do it right…  
_(The magician smirks and starts to lick the lollipop. A large censor bar appears before his mouth. Apparently the Federal Communications Commission decreed Hisoka's licking as too lewd to show.)_

**Illumi**: I do not like sweets.  
_(Interviewer bribes the assassin with triple his fee. Illumi proceeds to pluck out a random member of the audience, ties him down, and commands him to lick the lollipop until the center is reached.)_

**Buhara**: Only a single Tootsie Pop? I'm hungry.  
_(The large man empties the entire bag into this mouth.)_  
**Gon**: Wow, hunters sure are great!  
**Killua:** …I wanted those lollipops!

**Menchi**: (_She eyes the candy critically and takes one like before throwing it out the window._) It is not the right temperature.


	3. What is love?

_Note –_ Yet another question, this one is probably more cute than it is silly :P

---------------------------------

What is love?  
(as answered by the cast of Hunter x Hunter)

**Gon**: Aunt Mito, Killua, Leorio, and Kurapica! I would choose all of them as my lover.  
**Killua**: Do you even know what 'lover' means, Gon?  
**Gon**: Sure, the women on Whale Island told me all about what lovers do, it sounds like fun!  
**Hisoka**: Want to have some fun with me?  
_(The magician giggles madly as Gon backs away in horror.)_

**Killua**: It is the feeling you get when you spend a warm summer evening outside with your best friend and a box of chocolates. Well, that is if the friend doesn't want any of the chocolate, of course.

**Leorio**: When a man and a woman love each other they…(_He eyes Gon and Killua_). Are you sure it is okay to talk about this in front of kids?  
**Kurapica **_(Whacks Leorio on the head.)_: Love! Not loving, you pervert.  
**Gon**: What's the different?

**Kurapica**: Love is being with your family and knowing they are alive and well.  
**Gon**: We'll be your family, and we are happy and well!  
_(Gon hugs Kurapica who blushes furiously.)_

**Kuroro**: Being willing to do anything, even set in motion the destruction of the world, for your long gone friend.  
**Pakunoda**: Dancho, we all know you want to destroy the world to have the trench coats all to yourself.

**Hisoka**: Love is like a house of cards. You can have as many as you want but you can discard of them if you grew bored.  
_(Hisoka grins broadly at Gon, Machi, and Illumi.)  
(The three objects of his affection shudder and decide to mail the magician off to Istanbul.)_

**Biscuit**: Love is when my heart gets all fluttery from the sight of sexy g…ems, yes, gems.

**Illumi**: A cage.  
_(The assassin promptly attempts to stuff Killua into a steel cage.)_

**Senritsu**: The sound of your own soothing heartbeat is love.

**Neon**: Love is when father gets me whatever I want, even a human heart :)


End file.
